Peace, love, happiness
Life goes on, we have to move forward. Just 15 minutes ago I was in my doctor’s office explaining how lately I feel like my reality is distorted, and crying.
None of us are strangers to the world’s brokenness. We’ve all experienced the pain of loss, illness, injustice and as we look around this world it’s easy to feel hopeless.
I struggle with worry. I have for as long as I can remember. When I was a young kid, I would lie in my bed and worry. I always hated sleeping alone, and I remember sneaking into my brother’s room and sleeping on the floor next to his bed. Just knowing he was in the room gave me comfort. As time went on, more worry and anxiety began to creep into my heart and mind. After my pop passed away when I was a little girl, I began to worry about the mortality of all the people I loved. This started young, my worry with death. Though I was young, I still vividly remember it; so much sorrow, so much grief, so many tears. Even at eight years old, I remember wondering why. Why do people get hurt and sick? Why do people have to die? My questions were left unanswered.
Through all the battles I’ve faced in my life and continue to face, I’ve learned a lot of things – every lesson was a teacher. In the past, I often thought to myself ‘Just have peace. Be calm. You are okay but if I’m being honest, when I did this I never noticed a big difference in my level of peace. One day, it hit me. I was missing a key point in all of this.
Peace starts and ends with trust.
Trust things will get better, trust that things will work out, and trust that life always has its ups and downs but we can always work threw them. Trust that without hardship, we wouldn’t know what peace is. Even though hardship sucks, and seems like we are in it forever, and seems like it’ll never end. It will, that’s where faith and trust come in. To know that IF we work towards it, it’ll get better. Life brings us down but we can heal through anything whether it’s an addiction, PTSD depression, anxiety, and so on.
For me, I chose to call for help from a higher power of my understanding. For you, it might be different.
BUT happiness is possible.
Erika @ St. John’s, Newfoundland and Labrador